DAMSEL IN DISTRESS: MODERN-DAY FOLKTALES;
or,
Amusement for Adults,
compiled by
MAX BLITZ.
INTRODUCTION: Tiffany’s Troubles, and Her Helpers.
Our self-sacrificing heroine always does her best to do right by others, especially the men and boys who are only too happy to help her out of her difficulties.
Along the way, the gentle click of her mental kaleidoscope shows how her views change as a pair of decrepit old boots wins her affections in “The Godfather and the Goodfellas; or, Beauty and the Boots”, while in “Prince Charming and the Devil’s Thorns; or, Sleeping Beauty” an endangered species of wasps gains her sympathy.
[Note: Earlier versions of this story have appeared under different names on other websites. The end of the story has been expanded a bit in this version in order to emphasize the mind control the boy exercises over our heroine by implanting thoughts into her unconscious mind.]
Chapter 1: THE GODFATHER AND THE GOODFELLAS.
Beauty and the Boots: Welcome to the Country, City Girl.
Tiffany pulled her car up beside Buford, who was crossing the dusty drive towards his farmhouse. Buford grinned down at her. “Well, this is a surprise,” he said, “I certainly wasn’t expecting to see you today.”
Tiffany smiled back. “I wanted to thank you for seeing to it that I got fed this past year.” She had gotten into some financial difficulties; and Buford had been willing to help her out, for a price.
Buford grinned again. “My pleasure.”
Tiffany laughed. “Yes, I’m sure you enjoyed it a bit more than I did.” She reached for the gift-wrapped package on the passenger’s seat. “I brought you this.”
Surprised, Buford took the package. “Well, I certainly wasn’t expecting this either.”
“Now that I have some spare cash, I wanted to show you how much I appreciate what you’ve done for me.” She hesitated, then asked, “May I come in? I wanted to ask you something.”
“Sure.” Buford headed towards the porch, then stopped to remove his well-worn boots before he entered the house. Tiffany also removed her shoes before she entered the house. Buford liked to keep things clean.
Buford opened his present. It was a pair of fine leather boots. He looked up at Tiffany and grinned. Again, Tiffany smiled back. She was relieved that he seemed to like his present. Buford was rumored to have a good deal of money stashed away, but Tiffany knew from experience that he didn’t like to spend it. His old boots looked a lot older than Tiffany, who was twenty, and a student at the local college. Buford looked a lot older than Tiffany too; but then, he was a lot older.
He pulled on his new boots and paced up and down the room a few times. They felt good and comfortable. He nodded his approval. “So, what’s your question?”
Tiffany took a deep breath. She had been wanting to ask Buford for a while, but had always been too embarrassed to ask. She shifted uncomfortably, then said, “It’s about your old boots.”
Buford grinned again. Tiffany could feel her face getting hot. It was too late to turn back now. She took another breath. “I wanted to ask you,” she said, “what you were thinking when you were using me to clean the soles of your boots. At least, I think you were using me to clean them.” She paused. Buford didn’t say anything, so she continued: “I have my own ideas about what you were thinking, but I don’t really know, since you never said anything while you were cleaning them.” She paused again. “Anyway, I just wanted to know for sure whether I was right.” Tiffany looked down, unable to meet Buford’s gaze.