DeShawn did an incredibly selfless act for me and I am feeling guilty because I can’t remember it and so I have done nothing to acknowledge it.
DeShawn waited. He looked at his mother.
“Yes” she stated…again, flatly.
DeShawn’s eyes lit up. All sorts of ideas flooded his brain. He began the exit process.
When the process was done it took a moment for the fog to lift from Brenda. She sat still for about two minutes before her head cleared.
“How did it go this time,” she asked curious that it seemed like she had just sat down “what did we just do anyway?
“It went great mom. Just great” he chuckled to himself “do you really want me to explain this stuff you usually glaze over when I start.”
That was true. DeShawn would start and she would usually be lost by the third sentence…if it took that long. She had asked the question more to show interest than anything else. She looked at DeShawn, shook her head and laughed, “no…I guess I don’t.”
“Oh, hey mom I think I want to go hang out for a little while do you have twenty dollars” deShawn asked offhandedly.
“For you baby, of course I do,” she was eager to give the money now as she reached in her pocket for it “go have fun.”
“Thanks mom” DeShawn said happy that the prior day’s statement held.
Brenda got up to leave and was hit by a feeling of guilt for not doing enough for this wonderful son of hers. She knew he had done something huge and she didn’t even remember it. She knew that he deserved some kind of payment or reward and she hadn’t given it. And he said nothing about it. What an incredible boy. That made the guilt even more powerful. She reached in her pocket and fished out another twenty.
“DeShawn, I want you to take this too” she handed the money to her son.
He took it looking at the expression on his mother’s face which he understood to mean that it was the least she could do. Brenda left the room unsatisfied she knew the extra twenty was not enough.
Brenda was stunned. She knew in the back of her mind, if she was honest, that DeShawn probably had seen porn. Maybe he even liked it. To find it so haphazardly hidden was stunning though. His magazine was on his night table with just a book covering it and the book wasn’t even large enough to keep it hidden.
She sat on her son’s bed and pulled the magazine from its hiding place. It was a milf magazine. She started thumbing through the magazine but soon realized that several pages were stuck together. Just before the pages joined was an article title page: Good Mom, Bad Son. The article had an image of an older woman standing in a kitchen looking back at a younger man (her son) seated at a kitchen table with a mischievous look on his face. She couldn’t see any other pictures from the article because the were all stuck together.
Brenda felt uneasy.
She continued through the magazine until she found a similar situation where the article was about an apparent mother son combination and the pages were stuck together. Brenda’s stomach felt sick. Not only was DeShawn looking at porn but he seemed to key in on a very particular type and that was mother and son porn.