“And Anna, women,” he said conspiratorially, “I’ve never seen so many women in my life. Some of them looked like women here but there were young women dressed… provocatively. It was positively sinful. And they’d walk right up to me and ask for butter.” He said. Suddenly, the tang of jealousy was back, stronger now, but different. But I couldn’t imagine what it meant.
“What did Father say,” I asked.
“He told me that we are not supposed to comment about it, but to just provide the items they asked for and leave them alone,” he explained, “But it was so strange. Men were walking holding hands with women. Outside, just in the middle of the street. I’d heard rumors about these things at Church, but to see it was… I thought doing that in public would cause you to burst into flames or something,” Joseph explained and I laughed. We both thought about sin for a moment, wondered what it meant that he’d seen so much in the city.
“Joseph, I am so jealous,” I said finally, after thinking about all he had experienced, and he smiled sheepishly, “I can’t wait until next week!”
“Neither can I,” explained Joseph, “There was just so much that about halfway through the day I just sort of felt fuzzy and numb. I couldn’t take in anymore. I am sure I missed things.”
“Well try to remember everything, I want to hear about it,” I pleaded.
“That is a good idea!” he said suddenly, moving items out of the truck more quickly than before.
“What?”
“If I am trying to remember and document everything for you, it will keep me focused. When I go to town I will come back and we will go through everything together from beginning to end. Then we can work together and make sense of things,” he explained, “You are always better at understanding complicated things. So I will be the eyes and you will be the brain.” I felt sort of touched that he thought of me that way.
“I think that is a good idea, glad I thought of it” I said happily. The truck was completely empty now, like it had never left. I looked over at my younger brother and smiled.
“Thank you for letting me know everything, I know you could get in a lot of trouble if anyone finds out,” I said, suddenly realizing the risk Joseph was taking for me. He could be shunned for telling me these things. I, of course, was liable for punishment too, but likely only a beating.
“Anna,” he said as though completely surprised by my concern, “You are my sister and my best friend, really my only friend, what is an experience if I can’t share it with you?” He said and I felt my heart swell. I reached over and grabbed Joseph’s hand, squeezing it once. Then we went back into the house and did the dishes.
* * * * *
In the next few weeks, Joseph and I settled into a routine. All week we would be excited and anxious as market day approached. Then Joseph would go off to the city to sell goods with my father. All that day would be nervous agony for me. I couldn’t wait for him to get home and tell me everything. In the evening he would return and we would share an interminable dinner with Mother and Father. Then, we’d go out to the barn to clean out the truck and Joseph would describe the world to me.
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