I didn’t say goodbye. I just gently hung up the phone.
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Rings are circular; you know, the circle of life thing. I reached down to my right front pants pocket and with my right hand tapped the small box holding an engagement ring. In my left hand I held Stephanie’s small hand. I put my right hand back on the small of Stephanie’s back as we made our way around the dance floor at Avery’s wedding.
I received the invitation in the mail two months ago. I haven’t talked to Avery too much in recent years — a stray text or email — but I was thrilled to get the invite. She was a pivotal presence in my life at a critical time, and if things had worked a little differently she would be Mrs. Mickey Olerud. Instead, at the ripe old age of 42, she was going to be Mrs. Joachim Nagel, a first marriage for both. She had gone on to live up to her potential as one of the world’s top plant pathologists, and had met the esteemed Dr. Nagel through her cancer research work. The two good doctors hit it off, and the rest, as they say, is history. I almost couldn’t be more pleased.
My invitation was for a plus-one, and after several weeks of thinking about it, I decided to ask Stephanie to join me on the trip. And then I got to thinking … and it just clicked for me. It was Avery helping me out one more time. She was the one who played a part in starting my current lifestyle, and she was the one playing a part in possibly ending it.
I never told anyone about buying an engagement ring for Avery all those years ago, not even her. I didn’t want that to become an issue. I knew I had to let her go. So I quietly took the ring back to my favorite jeweler, but I never got a refund. I don’t know why, but I told him to just hang on to my money, and someday I’d come back in and buy something else. Two weeks ago, I bought that something else, and I’ve been carrying it around ever since.
Stephanie and I both took two weeks off and drove out to California for the wedding, taking some detours around to hit some museums and zoos. I’ve often told people that one way to check your compatibility with another person is to take an extended car trip together, and this trip pointed out to me that I was making the right decision.
We got to San Diego a couple of days before the wedding and got to spend some time with the happy couple. I received a bone-crushing hug from the bride-to-be the first time we met up, and was introduced for the whole time as her “most special friend in the whole world.” I’m sure she filled in Joachim as to our past, but since I came out with a date he didn’t seem threatened and was actually a very nice guy — probably the kind of guy I would have chosen for Avery if I couldn’t have her.
I had filled in Stephanie about Avery years ago, stopping just shy of telling her about the engagement ring, so Stephanie knew that Avery and I shared something special. If she seemed the least bit bothered by this she never let on, and in fact, she and Avery seemed to hit it off very well.