She was his wife’s bitch sister

“My situation, huh? Exactly when did these conversations take place?” I asked.

I noticed Ginny look up when I said that. Perhaps she realized it wasn’t a surprise job offer the night before. It was almost funny, watching the wheels turn in Ginny’s mind.

Ever the politician, he dodged the question.

“I think two weeks from tomorrow should be your first day, Jane,” he smiled. “I’ll need to have you in Washington as soon as possible.”

I didn’t like what he implied by ‘have you,’ and I could tell Ginny wasn’t pleased either. At least my misery had company.

*****

For the next two weeks, we fought incessantly. I wasn’t happy being ambushed with her new job and I was more not happy with the fact that she’d be living with him in Washington DC for most of the year.

Six months after she left, I’d only seen her once.

During that time, President Brown survived an assassination attempt and resigned in scandal, and Brian was fast-tracked as the front-runner for his party’s Presidential nomination. Instead of running a campaign in a couple of years for the senate, Jane was immediately installed as his campaign manager for president.

Jane missed my birthday, and our anniversary, spent her birthday with Brian and Ginny in Washington, and for all intents and purposes was gone from our marriage.

The final straw for me was when she stopped putting money into our joint account. Her excuse was that she had to keep her money separate in case the campaign was audited, but I didn’t buy it. I had to dip into our savings so I could make our mortgage payment on the monstrosity she had to have.

I had divorce papers served to her on the day Brian accepted the party’s nomination at the national convention. I hadn’t been invited, but that didn’t matter. We were living separate lives, and I wanted to move on.

I didn’t think she cared as she never bothered to call me, that is until my lawyer went after her financials.

Suddenly, she tried to stop the divorce. I wouldn’t take her calls, so Brian started calling me, begging me to stop the divorce on her behalf.

He offered me a million dollars to stay married. His biggest mistake was leaving that offer on my voicemail. I gave it to Fox News. I always liked how Harris Faulkner and Sandra Smith’s legs were always encased in shimmery stockings.

It turned out that a Presidential candidate trying to buy off the husband of his campaign manager was big news for a couple of days. Rush Limbaugh called them the “drive by media” for a reason and they certainly proved that point with my news.

Originally, I thought he just didn’t want bad press, but no other reporters ever called me or showed up on my doorstep. Our divorce wasn’t news anymore, and I was willing to bet no one knew Jane was married.

After months of legal wrangling and court hearings, the judge ordered my wife to provide records of all her earnings and asset accounts.

Feces struck the rotating blades after that.

It turned out Brian and Jane were doing some kind of funny business with campaign funds. For some reason, there were ten million dollars of campaign money sitting in one of Jane’s accounts.

Please wait…
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