I took my thumb and forefinger and pinched my nipple. My head swam. All the things I had been feeling seemed to be getting more intense. I pinched again and I was certain. Whatever was happening to me was in some way connected to my nipples. And I liked it. I brought my other hand up and started to pinch my other nipple as well. I found that if I squeezed both of my breasts, not just the nipples, the feeling was even more intense. I writhed on the bed. I felt something building, but I didn’t know what. It was maddening. It kept making me feel more and more anxious but at the same time I didn’t want to stop. For a long while, I just played with my breasts, feeling every aspect of my touch. But the more I did, the less my body responded to the controls of my brain. My legs moved as though I had no control over them, moving side to side. By chance I happened to squeeze my legs together.
“Hmmph” I moaned around my bit lower lip. My thighs had brushed against the hard pink little nub between my legs. The feeling was a thousand times more intense than my nipples. The first instant I felt that feeling, I needed more of it. I squeezed my legs together again and didn’t feel anything. I tried a third time and got nothing. I wondered if it was something that could only happen once or if I was not touching it correctly.
I moved my fingers from one hand away from my breast and slid it down across my stomach. Every spot that my hand touched felt more alive after it passed. I sucked in breath quickly. My hand moved down to the bottom of my stomach and against the slightly raised area right above my private area. Then, my finger brushed the hard little pink nub. I shuddered all over. My hand involuntarily squeezed on my breast, making the feeling more intense.
“What is going on?” I asked myself quietly. It didn’t feel like I was existing in the real world. Everything felt cloudy and strange. And lovely. I slowly began to move my finger against (what I later learned was) my clit. My breathing was shallow and each pass of my finger pushed me farther and farther into the strange, sensuous cloud. All the while I was thinking. I was thinking about the man’s body in the magazine, the way he was put together. I didn’t know why. And I thought about my brother also, about kissing him, about the way his arms felt around me.
I guess in thinking about all of this, I’d lost tracking of what I was doing. I became aware that my finger had slipped off my clit and was now touching the slit below. My fingers felt hot and wet. I put them away brought them to my face. The liquid was clear and thick, stretching out between my outstretched fingers. I held it to my nose, smelling it. It was a musky aroma that seemed to fill the entire room, and it was lovely. I felt an intense curiosity about it. SO curious, I could not stop myself from what I did next, I plunged my fingers into my mouth, tasting the salty flavor of my vagina’s juices. I felt my cheeks get hot as I savored the flavor, rolling the liquid around in my mouth. What was I doing?
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