“Doctor?” I stammered.
“Professor and Doctor Adolph Clickstein, at your service young man,” he responded gravely, but his serious mien was softened by a friendly twinkle in his eyes.
After a few minutes of perfunctory conversation we went into the living room where Mom had prepared a full roast beef dinner with all the trimmings for our supposedly exalted guest.
Patty couldn’t stop herself from attacking the doctor almost from the second we sat down to eat, weaving a tale of broken promises we’d all received for fifteen years from confident doctors.
“Sometimes I think you guys never think about the patient,” she finally charged. “Jimmy’s got feelings Doctor Clickstein; I don’t want him hurt again just to satisfy your ego.”
“Is that why you want to become a Doctor yourself, Miss O’Scoury?” he asked Patty. “To do better?”
“Maybe,” she agreed.
“I do know something about suffering, about pain Miss, and then he slowly rolled up his left sleeve, and silently exposed a line of faded blue numbers.
“Jesus,” I gasped as I stared at that incredibly ugly tattoo, recognizing immediately what it signified.
“The Nazis?” Mom whispered.
“I’m sorry Doctor,” Patty started before the doc interrupted her.
“Don’t worry, don’t worry, it was a long time ago. I shouldn’t have shown it to you,” he said quietly, all our attention now on his soft words. “The only reason I did is because I want you all to know that I won’t do anything to hurt Jimmy, I’ve seen enough,” he said with a sigh. “Now maybe I’ll be able to help you and maybe I won’t, but Jimmy, I promise you I won’t lie to you or give you some cock and bull story or prolong any treatment that’s not helping you.”
A certainty that he was going to help me coursed through my body as I heard his words – I didn’t know how but I knew it with an almost religious conviction.
“Now ladies,” he continued, motioning to Mom and Patty, “I think Jimmy and I should have some privacy while I conduct my examination.”
“But I always…,” Mom started before Patty grabbed her arm and led her from the room.
~~~~~
“I’ve studied your file Jimmy,” he started, tapping the ten inch medical file that Mom had amassed over the years as he talked. When he added, “Unfortunately, most of your previous doctors weren’t much better than quacks, and the last one, Brown, is both a fool and a charlatan.” I couldn’t help but laugh as he continued. “But I guess you figured that out, didn’t you?”
Seeing my nod, he continued, “I believe I can do you some good son, we’ll see.” He quickly gave me a physical, measuring and examining me with a professionalism I’d never felt in all the previous ordeals I’d undergone.
“You have two problems Jimmy,” he finally announced. “One, of course, you know – the whole question of your size or lack of it. But there is another one, one maybe even more important for your future happiness, and that’s the fact you still haven’t gone through puberty, you’re still a boy and are in danger of never becoming a functioning man.”
I flinched at his direct words, but then became engrossed as he talked, for a half an hour he explained everything carefully, and then outlined a course of treatment while welcoming all my questions. He finally ended by asking how much I wanted him to share with Mom. “Its up to you son, I’ll just tell her what you want.”