Justin buried his head against his mom’s neck and collapsed on top of her, exhausted. She ran her hand through his hair and rubbed his back. The sound of her breathing, calm and steady, was the most relaxing thing he’d ever heard.
From behind them, the cupboard door made a noise and slipped open. Justin began to chuckle, and as his mother joined in, they both broke out into loud, infectious laughter.
***
Neither of them said a word for the next few minutes. Emily stood up first, gathering herself into her robe and wordlessly disappearing upstairs. Justin finally found himself unable to avoid the inevitable deluge of thoughts and self-aware judgments.
I’ve gone off the deep end. I’ll never come back from this.
He rushed up to his room. The shower was running in the bathroom, and he walked by it quickly, keeping his eyes on the floor. He closed the door behind him and sat down on his bed, completely and utterly confused.
It had felt amazing. That single fact was what Justin kept coming back to. He wanted to deny it, but deep in his bones, he found himself unable to. The sex had felt incredible, like getting a glimpse of another world, a world filled with evil temptation and blissful corruption.
I can never do that again. I have to bury the memory, forget it ever happened.
He leaned back on his bed. In his mind’s eye, he could still see his mom’s naked body, her perfect skin, big breasts, and the way her cheeks had been slightly flushed. Justin bit his lip until it threatened to split open and buried his face in his pillow.
“Justin?” His mom’s voice came from outside his door. “Are you okay?”
The door opened before he could answer, and his mom walked into the room. Justin couldn’t even make an attempt to look at her.
“Hey,” she said, sitting down next to him on the bed. “Justin…”
He finally sat up. She was wearing a baggy sweatshirt, one of his, in fact, along with black yoga pants. She had a small towel wrapped around her hair. It was a proper outfit, at least in comparison to how she’d been dressed in the kitchen before, and he breathed a sigh of relief.
“Mom,” he said. “I don’t know what just happened.”
He shook his head and met her eye. She was smiling, and her face was filled with love, compassion, and concern.
“I don’t either,” she said. “I’m a grown adult, and I don’t always understand what’s going on, or why things happen. Especially when it comes to sex.”
She bowed her head slightly. Justin knew what she was going to say, but for some reason, he needed to hear it out loud.
“I love you, Justin,” she whispered. “As a son. And even if things get confusing, or weird, or completely out of control between us, I’ll still love you.”
“I love you too, mom.”
His mother smiled at him and ruffled his hair.
“See? Was that so hard?” She stood up from the bed and started walking toward the door. “I’m going to hold off on cooking until later tonight, for dinner. Any requests?”
Justin shook his head and swallowed.
“Anything is fine by me,” he said.”
“Great.” She smiled at him one last time and then opened the door. “Oh, and one more thing?”