I returned to my chair and turned on my e-reader and got a half a page in and shut if off. My mind was distracted. A swirl of thoughts ran around in my head. Donna and her situation, Priya’s efforts to sort out her feelings and my feelings for her. Divi’s persistence and my inability to deal properly with it. All these years since Anna died, I hadn’t even thought much about sex. Now, all of a sudden, it was everywhere. Fortunately, it was like riding a bike. I sat there in my chair with my beer thinking about my sex life. I knew almost to the minute when it ended and I knew with a little less certainty when it started again. I think everyone remembers when their sex lives started. I certainly did.
I was eighteen. In fact, it was my eighteenth birthday when my sex life started and I remembered every second. To clarify, that was when my sex life started with someone other than myself. I’d dated a few girls in high school and had gotten so close to having sex but then the girls saw my junk or touched it and they would practically run screaming into the night. I would have thought that at least one of them would have been adventurous and jerked me off or given me a blow job or something, but no such luck.
I lived with my mother and my older sister Janet. My father had flown the coop when I was only three. I never met him and don’t remember him at all. Janet is five years older than me. She remembered him and spoke fondly of him. She’s very much like my mother and they drove each other nuts when she was in her teens. I was into sports at school and that was all I cared about. I just ignored Janet’s bullshit and their incessant arguments.
Mom was eighteen when Janet was born. She was, and still is, very beautiful. Various men came and went over the years. She never married any of them. I liked some of them and others, I didn’t. I think Janet liked every one of them and she and Mom had some vicious fights, which I just tuned out. In later years, I came to understand what they fought about.
Janet was a teenage version of Mom and she was very popular with the boys. Her body blossomed early with big boobs and narrow waist with curvy hips and long shapely legs. She showed all of those attributes off regularly and many times was sent home from school to change into something more appropriate. She drove all the boys absolutely nuts. The Phys Ed teacher was caught red-handed with his dick in her mouth and he lost his job. Janet’s reputation, that she had cultivated through high school, was the only thing that saved him from going to jail. Mom knew only too well what she was all about. I later came to find out that Janet was screwing Mom’s boyfriends when she wasn’t around. I just ignored it all and studied and played sports.
Janet loved to make fun of my apparent inexperience with sex and girls in general. She asked me if I was gay and I objected to her insinuation. She just raised her hands in surrender and said, “Just asking.”
From the clothes that Janet liked to wear to school, you could imagine what she wore at home. I had an erection most of the time and I relieved them in our one bathroom. I didn’t hide any pornography in the bathroom to jerk off to like my friends did. Between visualizations of Mom and Janet, I didn’t need any. Both Mom and Janet knew exactly what I was doing in there for long periods of time. One or the other would bang on the door and yell, “Come on Jack. Quit jerking off. I need to go.”