I looked at the reflection of my big breasts. My nipples were now relaxed. I couldn’t believe a short time ago my son had sucked and teased them with his tongue, driving me crazy.
“At least I didn’t cum. At least I didn’t let Danny make me cum,” I said. Thank goodness I had caught myself before I shattered that ultimate intimate barrier of sexual passion between a man and a woman. That seemed to give me some moral reinforcement. You have to take what solace you can when you just had sex with your son. I guess.
The shower was hot, and long.
***********************
Mazie, my savior, came over with a big container of homemade soup.
“Hi, Danny,” she said.
“Hi,” he said before leaving the kitchen.
“He hardly looked my way,” she said. “Not like him. He’s usually so friendly.”
I couldn’t tell her my son had emptied his balls already today into his mother and didn’t have any need for fantasies.
“Who knows with teenagers,” I said. I knew more today than I usually did.
“So. How do you feel now that you’ve had a chance to rest?”
Rest was not what had mostly taken place after I got home. “You know, I’m a lot more optimistic than I was earlier. I actually am feeling this is my best chance yet.”
“Really? That’s not like you to change like this. Unless—”
“Mazie, I know that look.”
“Did something happen to make your chances better by any stretch of the imagination?”
Mazie had often encouraged me to have some affair to fill the void caused by Melvin’s disability, growing cruelty, and inattention. I never had even taken her seriously. But, she was relentless.
“Wouldn’t it be the perfect time to pull the old switcheroo? Right? If you had some mysterious lover come and ‘water your garden’ today, so to speak—wouldn’t that be the perfect little scheme to stack the odds in your favor!”
“You and your plots. You know I could only do that with someone I loved. You know my boring life. How many people have I recently fallen in love with?”
“You’re letting facts get in the way of my theories, as usual. Are you telling me nobody visited today? And you didn’t go anywhere since I dropped you off?”
“Just me and Danny since he got home from school.” That was the truth. The falsehood by omission was that as we sat there, Danny’s sperm was wiggling and swimming around my ovum, looking to penetrate it as effectively as his cock had penetrated my vagina.
“Well, it was a good theory.”
“How many of your good theories have proven right?”
“I’m due,” she said.
“How about if you make a theory about you finding a guy to water your own garden?”
“I can’t tell you how long the drought has been,” she said. There was little playfulness in her voice.
I knew it had been rough for her, being a single mom and trying to still run her horse ranch.
“Like you said,” I patted her hand, “you’re due!”
“I should be going.”
“Danny! Mrs. Walker is leaving,” I called
Danny walked in and gave me a look I couldn’t identify. There must have been some reintegrating of all the emotions he was feeling.
“Goodbye, Mrs. Walker. Thanks for the soup.”