And the sex? The sex was everything I could have imagined. It was so wicked. It felt so dirty to be dominated by that black man. I was totally spent. Dan must have been worried that I was hurt with all the rough treatment my body received that evening as he kept asking me several times was I ok? Was everything alright? I laughed as I looked up to him and told him, “Yes! Danny, I way more than ok, I’m loving this!”
With concern and something else I could not read on his face, Dan looked down at me and softly said, “Ok Carrie, tell if you need a break, this is your fantasy.”
Again, I was in such a state of sexual frenzy during those 3 hours of complete mind-blowing sexual satisfaction, I ignored the words and tone in which Dan spoke them. Looking back I now see, I was slowly murdering the love of my life that evening and never even noticed it.
When we got home, Dan carried the one bag we had taken and was greeted by my mother. She looked at me a bit strangely and smiled, “Looks like you two had a nice time this evening.”
Dan walked over to her and hugged her for the longest time while thanking her for watching the kids while we were gone. He backed up, looked at the floor a moment, then looked her in the eyes, and hugged her again. And with that, he said was going use the computer some and said goodnight.
When he left, my mother with concern asked me, “What’s up with Dan? Is everything ok?” I was too tired to get into anything and just replied, “He’s fine mom, Dan’s got a lot on his mind with work lately. It’s nothing. We’re both just tired, that’s all.” My mother is no fool. Not like me. Mom knew right then something wasn’t right between us and with concern in her voice said, “Carrie baby, you know you can talk to me about anything, anytime ok sugar?” I assured her it was nothing and changed the conversation to the children. She could read me like a book but did push it. We talked a bit more, but as she was leaving, reminded me to keep in contact with her.
I went looking for Dan in the family room and found him already viewing and editing the video we made. I had already showered at the hotel and just wanted to go to bed. Tomorrow was another day with the kids running around, errands to run, clothes to wash, etc.
While Dan was busily working on the editing the video, I thought he must be more into this than I imagined. So I laughed, “Danny, come to bed. You can work on that some other time, it’s late. You must be at work tomorrow and I have the children to look after. We’ve had our fun, time for bed.”
At that point, Dan turned to me and flatly said, “Carrie, just go on up to bed. I want to work on this a bit more. Look at yourself, you’re worn out. Go up to bed and I’ll be up shortly. OK?”
That was when my gut feelings first started telling me something was off, “Dan, are you, ok sweetie? With all this tonight? Are we still good?”
Dan returned to his editing but in the same flat tone replied, “Carrie, it’s what you wanted, right? Well, you got it. It’s a little too late for this conversation now anyway don’t you think? Now go to bed, get some rest, and we’ll talk about it tomorrow night. OK? Everythings just great.” He didn’t sound like everything was great though. Maybe he was a little tired too.