Waiting in Line for the New iPad

He could imagine all the insults flying his way, the squeals of horror, the cutting criticism.

But there was only silence.

Then Noelle said: “Uh… I don’t think so. Guys do not want to hear a girl telling them what to do. Especially when it comes to that.”

It was as though being right was far more important to Noelle than pointing out what a complete loser Dylan was for eavesdropping and butting in.

Dylan again found his mouth betraying him. “You ever try it?” he asked.

Having been sitting side-on to him, the pretty brunette turned her head to him now, her gaze fixing right on him. He felt a burst of searing energy jolt through his heart as her stunning blue eyes latched on his face, and she was actually looking at him.

“I don’t need to try it to know they can’t handle it,” she said.

“And you can’t force them to deal with it? To do what you want?”

“Uh, no. I do want to have a social life.”

“What’s the point in sleeping with them if they don’t satisfy you?”

He could not believe he was talking to such a gorgeous girl about sleeping with someone.

“Because let’s face it, we’re not going to get better elsewhere,” she said.

Her friends were silent, not quite knowing what was going on. Who was this stranger? Why was he arguing with Noelle? Was he nuts? Was he drunk? Was he abusing his prescription?

“Sure you are,” Dylan said, then felt his mouth really running out of control again as the words just seemed to fall out: “Someone as attractive as you could get better anywhere.”

He saw Noelle’s cheeks flush slightly, and suddenly felt bad, that he’d embarrassed her in front of her friends. He didn’t mean to do that, not at all.

But she seemed to brush past it, re-asserting herself to regain the high ground, insisting: “If a girl tells a guy what to do, it’s like demeaning his masculinity.”

“And that’s based on what evidence? Gossip Girl?”

Noelle rolled her eyes, and Dylan heard one of her friends chuckle. She said: “You have no idea.”

He felt his insides cooling down a little, but they were still fluttering full of butterflies. Jeez, he was being bold. This was actually fun. Talking back to a member of the opposite sex like this – who would have thought?

Dylan got the feeling he’d never see these girls again – so what the hell if he made a fool out of himself in front of them?

He said: “Because I’m a guy, I have no idea what guys think?”

“That’s not what I said,” she huffed.

“That’s what it sounded like.”

She rolled her eyes. “Now you’re just pissed because you know you’re completely replaceable in the bedroom by a piece of vibrating plastic you can get for $9.99 on Amazon.”

“Oh, I can do more than just vibrate,” he said, surprising himself again with his own boldness.

He heard Noelle quietly gasp at that, and look away mild outrage at one of her friends. It made him feel all tingly inside to provoke her – had he really meant to sound quite that dirty and suggestive?

Noelle tried to conceal her reaction by taking the argument back a point or two. She said: “Guys feel all small and pathetic if girls tell them what to do. They can’t handle girls who know what they want.”

Please wait…

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