She came back out a few minutes later to find her bags sitting on the carpet and the counter empty. Well, I’m all moved in. She glanced out the window. If anything, the snow was coming down harder now. She sighed. And it looks like I’m not going anywhere for a while. Melanie stared out at the cottony sky, lost in thought, seeing nothing. I need a drink, she decided finally.
She opened the small refrigerator. There were three bottles of wine tucked in the door. She was about to go eanie, meanie, minie, moe, when a sudden thought occurred to her and she burst into a fit of giggles.
Absolutely, she thought, reaching for the Zinfandel. Under the circumstances, it has to be the ‘fruity’ wine. And with the lovely, elegant screw top, too. She twisted off the top and tossed it in the general direction of the trashcan. She took a sip, swishing the tart liquid back and forth in her mouth before swallowing. Oh, yeah. That’s the Brunch of Champions.
She surveyed the room, taking little sips as she walked. Now then, she thought. What do they have in this burg that qualifies as entertainment? She scanned the list of cable channels on top of the television. Wait a minute. This is the Honeymoon Suite, for crying out loud. Don’t they have any porn? Maybe you have to call the desk and order it. She had another fit of giggles. She saw herself calling down to the front desk. Mr. Hailey? This is Melanie Nichols in the Honeymoon Suite. I’m feeling a bit bored and I was wondering if I could order up some porn on my television? Why, of course, Miss Nichols, he’d answer. We have 10 separate channels for you to choose from. All gay.
She collapsed onto the sofa, laughing so hard she almost spilled her wine. Oh God, she thought, when she’d regained some control. That would be just my luck. Of course, the men in those movies are usually pretty well hung. And it would be more cock than I’d seen in a good long while. Who knows? Maybe one of them would belong to my husband. She took another swig of wine. Ex-husband, that is. She squeezed her eyes shut, fighting back tears.
All right, she thought. Time to change the subject. She opened her eyes and saw a folded, laminated card sitting on top of the bar. On the front had been drawn a heart and under it written the words, ‘Especially for You’. Melanie opened it and discovered a list of special amenities the hotel offered its Honeymoon Suite occupants. She noted that the tub in the bathroom was oversized and could be used as a hot tub, complete with bubbles. Also available for the romantically inclined was a complete ‘Chateaubriand for Two’ candlelight dinner. And then she saw it.
“Get a Massage: The perfect way to prepare for a romantic evening or recover from a long trip. Performed by a licensed Massage Therapist, combining essential oils (aromatherapy) and moist heat hot packs, this Swedish Style Massage will increase your circulation, decrease stress and completely relax your muscles. Time: Approximately 90 minutes. Cost: Individuals, $150; Couples, $250.”