Fortunately, Connie was able to make graduation, which was the most bittersweet weekend of my life. I was so proud to see Kelsey receive her degree, and I knew my wife felt the same. We both beamed as our daughter walked across the stage and accepted the scroll in her hand. We shared a wonderful dinner with Kelsey and her friends, and things could not have been more perfect. Sadly, reality came crashing back into our lives early the next morning when Connie had a seizure, so I had to get her back to the hospital as rapidly as possible.
Within weeks, the doctors released her to live out her remaining days at home, and we prepared a bed where the home health aides could attend to her without being too intrusive. Connie barely shed a tear and was strong right to the end. We lost her on a Tuesday morning, with both Kelsey and me at her side. She looked very peaceful as she took her last breath, which gave us both a small measure of consolation.
The funeral was just for family, and then we hosted a larger group at our home afterwards. The party was a celebration of life, just as Connie had asked for. She told me she wanted no crying, but that was completely impossible. The loss of such a special soul was felt by everyone, so as we reminisced, we went from laughter to tears easily. But there was a lot of laughter, and I knew Connie would have been pleased.
Of course there were tons of flowers, which she would have loved. There were blooms of all sizes, shapes and colors, filling the room with a fragrance reminiscent of her little shop. The sensation left me thinking of much happier times, which made me smile but also at times made Connie’s absence more acute.
I constantly looked around the room for Kelsey as I felt the need to monitor how she was holding up. She seemed to be doing quite well and floated between our friends and lent support to those that needed a hug or a pat on the back. She was so much like her mom, it was amazing. I marveled at how someone so young and small could be so strong.
Once everyone had said their goodbyes, Kelsey and I were alone in our large home. After all the chatter of that day, the house was suddenly very silent. We sat together on the couch and looked towards the fireplace. Connie’s remains were in an urn on the mantle below our favorite picture of her.
My wife made it clear she did not want any gaudy mausoleum and wanted to be returned to nature in a simple way. Kelsey and I put our heads together, and came up with a plan we were sure Connie would have approved of. In the rear corner of our backyard, we had a small patio on which my wife would spend her free time in the summer. She had surrounded it with plants, but there was one open space that she never had time to fill in.
We mixed her ashes into some fresh potting soil, and then used it to plant Connie’s favorite rose variety, a hybrid tea called, “Olympiad.” Its blooms are a deep shade of red and are perfectly shaped like you might see in pictures. It’s also highly fragrant, which reminded both of us so much of Connie as she was always surrounded by the scent of flowers.
wpDiscuz