“I’m sorry, Mom.”
He sounded, not sad, but disappointed.
“Danny, we did a wrong thing for a right reason. Let’s leave it at that. You’ve got to understand I’ll be feeling guilty about doing this for a while, maybe forever. I’m the adult here and should be more responsible. I want you to know you shouldn’t feel the least bit guilty yourself. You were only doing what I told you to do, what I let you do. It’s all on me.”
“It’s all IN you, Mom!” he joked. In spite of the situation, that made me smile. “I don’t feel the least bit guilty. I’m glad it happened. Real glad.”
I felt a little better. Still, I had to somehow reestablish our roles as Mother and son. It would probably take some time, so I was prepared not to push it.
“Don’t ever be afraid to tell me about any bad feelings you have about this. Other than that, I don’t want to discuss our having sex ever again. This was one, beautiful, magical time we got to spend as few human beings get to do. And, you can never tell anyone else about this, especially your father. Do you understand?”
He maybe gave a nod, then asked, “When do we know?”
“Huh?”
“When do we know you’re pregnant?”
I figured this was the ONE question he should be able to ask since he was intimately, biologically involved.
“About two weeks. My period is due in 10 days, and I’m like clockwork. Always have been since 12 years old!”
“Mom!”
It was funny to see his embarrassment with talking about periods when he had just been shaft-deep in the same female geography. Maybe he was going to be OK. Maybe we were going to be all right.
“Let Mommy rest now. It’s the best thing I can do to make this work.”
He disentangled his clothes from my panties and bra on the floor and as he left he said, “I love you.”
***********************
I managed to doze. I wouldn’t have thought it was possible with all that raced through my mind, but a kind of exhaustion caught up with me.
When I awoke, at first I didn’t remember what had happened. And, then I did. It all raced back with all the repercussions possible.
I looked at the clock and an hour had gone by.
“Just as well,” I said out loud to myself. I eased the pillow away from my bottom. I felt it and there was only a small damp spot. “Good, it stayed put.” I was referring of course to he flood of cum my son had deposited. The more that stayed inside, the better chance of success.
I felt between my legs. My pubic hair was stiff and crusty with dried cum. The entrance of my vagina was gooey. I took a wad of tissues and jammed them there. Then got up. This had begun with a shower, now, a few hours later, I definitely needed another. I picked up the panties, those same panties my own son had stripped off me, and slipped them on to hold the tissues secure.
In the bathroom, I caught sight of myself in the mirror. There I was the same person I had always been, but different now. I stared at my face for a long time before saying, “Hi, I’m Jen, Danny’s Mom. We just had sex, and right now this minute I’m loaded to the brim with his sperm.” I shook my head.