So yes, I was annoyed. But it was at the circumstance, not at them. Frankly, I was more irritated I didn’t get a fun date than that I was unlikely to get hard cock.
:: Okay, I love you. See you tonight. Cora says hi and that she’ll pretend to be you so you kind of get spiritual cock by proxy. I don’t think that’s how it works. ::
:: U had better fuckin well take photos or ur in the dog house buddy! ::
:: Shall do. <3 ::
It was Wednesday, I wasn’t in the mood to masturbate any more, I wasn’t going to get cock and I wasn’t going on a date. Things weren’t looking good. Given the circumstances, I turned to the reliable comforter of all jilted wives and lonesome lovers.
**********
Tara and Teagan were in the kitchen when I went to the freezer to get the ice cream which, of course, was what I meant by ‘comforter.’
We have a nice house with a big kitchen. Apparently the family who built it had four kids and they used half of the kitchen as their dining room, so it was far from crowded. Not with half as many children and no need for a table, thanks to the dining room that the second family built on ten years after the house was first constructed.
My children were both topless, but that was nothing new. The whole family went around topless a lot of the time – when the weather was good, anyway. Funnily enough Teagan had a period in high school where he wasn’t seen without a shirt – probably because he got pretty chunky there for a few years – but Tara didn’t care. Al and I refused to teach them that bodies were shameful and they grew up with us typically naked from the waist up.
I was topless, too, and somewhat less enticing a sight than my daughter’s firm tits when I wandered in.
“You’re a bit underdressed, aren’t you, Mum?” Tara asked, looking up from her X-Men comic and pushing her glasses up her nose.
“Not really,” I told her, trying and completely failing to keep the self-piteous disappointment out of my voice. “Your Dad pulled out of our date night.” That made Teagan look up, too, from his phone. “He has to work back late at the office.” Even to me the excuse sounded a bit stupid, even though I knew it was true. There’s no point lying to your wife to fuck women when she doesn’t really care if you do.
I saw Teagan’s frown, though, and I knew what that meant. Because we’re not entirely devoid of morals, Al and I kept our sex lives out of our kids’ business. They had no idea we were shameless hussies. Is a man-hussy called a hussy? He is now.
I could just see the cogs whirling behind their eyes as my kids started to wonder – and probably not for the first time – if their Dad was cheating on their Mum. What could I say? ‘Don’t worry, kids, I know he fucks other women, but you wouldn’t believe how many non-Dad dicks I’ve had in my mouth in this month alone’? Probably not. Even I have limits.
Well… I thought I did.
Tara was the first one to speak and her eyes lit up in that way they do when she’s dead certain that what she’s about to utter is, clearly, the most brilliant thing anyone could say in the situation.