Mom laughed at my discomfort.
“Well look at my gene pool!” I argued. “I didn’t have much choice of not being a sex fiend. I mean, Mark got none of it, I must of got all of it from both you and Dad!”
“Well, Trav. Let’s not make each other uncomfortable then. I propose that there be no masturbating this weekend. It’s too messy.”
Well she was right about that, my shit gets everywhere.
“Ok then,” I responded. “I can take it if you can. But remember, ‘We always tell the truth in this house’! So no fibbing.”
“Me?” Mom responded, as if she was aghast at the suggestion. “Fib? Never? It’s on. But there must be a penalty, in case someone loses control…”
“Hmmm. Penalty.” I thought for a few moments. Then I came up with a great and terrible idea.
“How about,” I began. “Whoever ‘loses’, has to have the other person watch them ‘lose’ again?”
Holy fuck what did I just suggest? One of us watch the other masturbate? I’m some kind of sick fucking puppy and I don’t know if there’s a heaven but I’m pretty sure there’s a hell and I’ll be in it with all the other derelicts and deviants and killers and–
“Deal!” Mom said.
We worked the dirt for a while in silence.
“Who said it could get this fucking hot in May?” I wondered aloud. I pulled my T-shirt over my head to try and catch some breeze. I got back to work, I was trying to chop the roots away from some other fucking tree that was invading the flower bed.
“Foul!” Mom called. “Um… Un-necessary Buffness!”
“What?” I teased back. “There’s no fouls! There’s no rules! It’s jut win or lose, mama!” I had bulked up over the years, though. Nice to be noticed. I made sure to flex my arms more, now that I knew she was watching. ‘Foul’, my ass! Ooh, yeah, my ass. I should turn a little more away from her so I can bend over for her and grab some fucking roots.
“Foul!” Mom said again. “You can’t point your smelly ass at me!”
“It does NOT smell! Okay… it probably does… but that’s not a foul because you made me come out here!”
Mom was muttering under her breath just barely loud enough for me to hear her. She was teasing some more. “God damn kids… show no respect… put em through college… they cheat at the games…”
I just chuckled until Mom sat up straight and stretched. She arched her back and stuck her arms way up in the air. Her chest swelled to enormous proportions as she breathed in a cleansing breath.
“You were right,” she said. “It’s damn hot out here.”
I kept sneaking looks as she went about her business like I wasn’t there. She undid the top button on her old ratty shirt. Then the next. And another one. Christ! How many buttons are on this fucking shirt? She undid all of them, just leaving the shirt tails tied right at her belly button.
I could now see exposed boob flesh.
Cleavage. Lovely, dark, and deep. But I have promises to keep. And many days before I… masturbate.
I returned to my work, trying to hide my rising boner. I sneaked peaks back over my shoulder. Mom was on all fours, moving about, lifting a hand to grab a petunia and place it in the ground. Her breasts swayed back and forth, and they shook and trembled as she moved about the garden.