She cocked a skeptical eyebrow at me, looking so much like her mother then. “So you didn’t mean it?”
I thought furiously back to what I’d said. It had all come out in a rush, but there was no filter on it, on me. I’d meant every word of it and that was my hell to endure. “No… no, I did. All of it. It’s true. And I hate myself for it. And I shouldn’t have said any of it to you. It’s not fair to. This is my problem, not yours, and it’s something I’m going to have to work out on my own.”
Again, she said, “Bullshit.” Then she tilted her head back for a soft laugh, making herself look even more achingly beautiful without even meaning to. “Look at you, Dad! I mean, seriously. Look at you. Look at us!” She paused a moment and then grew serious. “Look: cards on the table. I noticed you looking at me differently. And, honestly? It made me feel wonderful. It made me feel like a woman, like Mom. And you know what? I didn’t care that it was you looking at me that way. I mean, why should I? Look at our family, Dad! Look at where I came from, where YOU came from! Where MOM came from! At this point, Dad, if you weren’t having lustful thoughts about me, incestuous though they may be, I’d think there was something wrong with you. With me. Dad, let’s face it: incest is as much a part of our way of life as it is part of our heritage.”
I shook my head in defiance. “But you should be able to make that choice on your own, not with pressure from me!”
And then her steely blue eyes got a hard look about them. “What makes you think I’m not, Dad?” she asked sternly. “What makes you think I’d want it any other way?”
Well. That was a stumper.
“…what?”
My daughter huffed in exasperation and rolled her beautiful eyes at me. “Dad, you think I don’t have urges, too? The full extent of my sex life consists of what I learned from Mom, the Internet and a hairbrush handle two years ago. But it doesn’t mean I’m content with that, Dad. Far from it. I know how beautiful I am, and that’s not a conceit. Mom didn’t mince words with either of us and she made it very clear to me that, eventually, I’ll come of age and want to have sex. And who do I have to turn to? You. And don’t go thinking that you shortchanged me somehow, that you locked me away from other boys and stunted my growth. I don’t want, NEVER wanted any of those outside boys. I’ve interacted with enough of them online to know that 99% of them are idiots and fools and as transparent as glass. I wanted YOU. Just like you wanted Mom. And she wanted her father. It’s in our genes. Might as well own up to it and accept it. And she knew it, too. You know what she told me? I’m sure you can guess. But just in case you need to be hit over the head with it, Dad, she told me that, when I was ready and if you were willing, I was welcome to continue the family tradition. With you.” Before I could interject, she silenced me by rushing forward. “So here’s the deal, Dad. You won’t pressure ME? That’s a laugh. No. I won’t pressure YOU. Much. But you’re the man I want to be my first, my last and my only. So I’ll seduce you. We can make a game out of it if you like, hold out as long as you can, but I prophesy that you will lose that game. I’ve known you wanted me for a long while now, probably before you even realized it yourself, so I know how this is going to end.”
wpDiscuz