“Beth, that was the most erotic thing I had ever seen,” Ken said quietly, referring to the DVD. “But the fact that it was another man, not me, giving you that much pleasure made me sick to my stomach. Ron had shamed and humiliated me but I knew what I had to do.” He was hanging his head and waiting to see if I would let him continue. I had stopped struggling and nodded mutely for him to go on.
“I quit seeing Jennifer immediately and I never cheated on you again,” he declared. “I swear it. Then I set my mind to learning how to give you that kind of pleasure. I used Ron’s DVD like kind of an instructional video, comparing your reactions to what Ron did, to how you were reacting to my efforts.” I had never seen Ken look so forlorn. We were both crying as we silently stared at each other for several minutes. I reluctantly conceded that he had been very successful with his efforts.
With his confession finished, he unfastened the cuffs and left me alone to sort out my feelings. It was like I was right back to square one; we had both cheated. Where did that leave us? Were we even? I tried to remain calm and think objectively but I couldn’t focus.
The quilt and shame I had lived with for the past ten years had been replaced with anger and chagrin. How could I get past that? It took me quite a while to process this new reality and sort through my feelings. But after considerable contemplation, I came to the realization that Ron had actually done a wonderful thing for us. Astounding as it sounds, he had single-handedly saved our marriage.
He could easily have enticed me to carry on an affair with him under the rationale of getting even with my husband. Instead he unselfishly did the one thing that would ensure I would try to improve my marriage. And it worked. Ken and I were together and both happily monogamous.
I will never forget what Ron did nor will I forget our one night together, which I now cling to as a much more favorable memory. Thank you, Ron. I’ll leave the curtains open.
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